Have you ever been so down on yourself that the smallest thing could mean to whole world to you? Well that's what happened today. So here's what happened. If you read my last blog, you know that I've had a pretty... rough week emotionally. I've been a wreck. well yesterday added to the list of "oh great.. one more thing to be upset about" list. I was heading to go take the ACT, and I got there and was all ready, and 5 minutes before the test was to start, when the lady was letting us in and checking for IDs, I realized that I didn't have my wallet (with my ID in it). I live 15 minutes away and there was 5 minutes before the test started. My friend was there and even verified who I was (a last-stitch effort to try and convince the woman to let me take the dang test) but it was no use. I couldn't get in. I cried the whole ride home, and then I just crawled into bed, hoping that I could wake up and start this whole day over. Of course that didn't work, but the whole rest of my day was just.. well.. UGH! I pretended I was alright, but honestly, the ID thing was the straw that broke the camel's back. I felt so miserable about everything about myself, I was a stupid, careless, forgetful, worthless, family-ruining, awful person. (Now I don't really believe these things... most of the time... but yesterday was just that.. well.. blehhh). Later that day, I tried to get up, dust myself off, and go out. I went to 4:12 groups at church. It was pretty interesting. This week, my school merged with another school because the groups had just gotten too small. Then we got down to the church service and things were alright. I got through the service, (noticing my mind-reading skills kicking into overdrive as I knew almost every point the pastor was about to put on the screen)and then I chilled and talked with some friends. Then me and 3 other friends decided to go to Dairy Queen. When we got there we just hung out, chilled out, had fun for an hour, made a hilarious video of one of them trying to shove a dipped cone in her mouth.. it was awesome. I got home, did some laundry, and crawled back to my little hole, where I could curl up and feel like crap again. Despite the fun ending, the beginning of the day had still broken me, not that I was gonna let it show. I woke up, got ready for church, put on make-up (yet another last-stitch effort, this time to make me feel kinda ok about myself... enough that I could get through the service without crumbling to pieces.) The sermon was good, the music was good,.. but I felt distant, which of course only made me feel worse. I just kept thinking "great! you're so worthless, you're letting all this crap get in the way of worshipping God... how can you live with yourself?!?!" Yes, stupid I know.. but that's just how crappy I felt. anyway.. we got upstairs and I was sitting there with my friend, and we were talking. One of her friends came up to talk to her... and I thought it was gonna be one of the standard "I'll just sit here while you two talk, no biggy, I'm invisible" things. I've never really had the opportunity to even meet him before, even though I've seen him a thousand times, and I was just not feeling good enough to strike up a first-time conversation. So anyway... he hugged her, and then he looked over at me sittin there and opened his arms. It took me about 10 seconds to realize.. "HEY! wake up... he's trying to hug you!! FOCUS!" I stood up, hugged him, and sat back down. But when I sat down,.. I didn't feel so awful.. I didn't feel so invisible. Yep that's right... one hug from a person I've never even met completely made my day. I don't know how, I don't really understand it myself. It wasn't any big life-changing, bearhug embrace that every girl longs for, it was just your average hug... so why did it make such an impact?!I think it was just that I wasn't invisible, I DID exist, I hadn't sunken so low that nobody could see me anymore. So anyways... thats pretty much it. It just goes to show that one tiny thing can change somebody's day. It could be a hug, or even just a smile. You'd be surprised at how much a hug can speak. A hug can say "I love you","You aren't invisible","I care about you","I'm here for you","You do exist","It's all gonna be alright." I bet you didn't know a hug could say so much did you? ha! You just have to watch, see what a hug does to somebody, see how the hug goes, is it quick? is it slow? is it tight? is it soft and soothing? OKAY WAIT! I'm wondering how this blog turned into my hugologist view of the world... o.O interesting... well anyway! back to the point. Share a smile (or a hug). You could just make someone's day, you could give them hope when it feels like they have none and not even know it!